What’s news?
“What’s news”? It’s a great opening line for a conversation along with “what’s you been up too” and “bloody cold isn’t it”. I don’t really know where I’m heading here but I think we should get on with it.
My team
I’m not going to upset too many natives when I brag about the Tigers win against the Lions, however it’s a bit different to last week when we managed to beat the Bombers. I didn’t mention it for one reason alone, half of the Marnoo natives actually barrack for Essendon and I know they would relinquish their subscription to this publication if I waffled on about it. Being my only source of income I don’t want to lose half my subscribers. So I didn’t mention the bombers game did I!!!
Guru in clover
They tell me and I hope I’m not jumping the gun here, but “The Gurus” (Norm & Margie Duxson) are happy at the news that #2 daughter Tanya is expecting. This news comes on the back of #1 daughter Pauline having given birth to another “rug rat”. No wonder the guru has a case of shrinking jacket disease!!!
Facebook worry
I have this message on my facebook site that a local native lady was asking another male native (both my facebook friends) “how did you pull up this morning”. That can conjure any kind of innuendo but let me tell you it is all above board.
WA trip
I haven’t heard any news from the group of no tillers who are on the Junket in WA with NewAg CEO Andrew “Clown” Newall. But don’t despair folks it is odds on for some headlines next week.
Tug of war anchor
I won’t mention any names because yours truly is no shrinking violet but I have it on good authority that a few natives had a weight off last weekend at some shearing shed scales whilst on a crop inspection. I’m told they were weighing themselves for the right to anchor the local tug-a-war team. The favourite weighed in at a healthy 130kg and will be lining up soon as team captain and anchor.
He can jump
Former Callawadda Primary School star pupil Sandy “The know all” McGregor was in the winner’s circle again with champion jumper Some are Bent. I’m told that The know all took his celebrations to a new level after the win in what we believe will only be a warm up compared with the trip to Japan early next year. The race is worth a cool million smackers and if they win that the Asahi (Japanese beer) will flow like the muddy once did!!
That’s all folks
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Welcome again
Welcome to another week of the SLF. Well it has been a rather moist 10 or so days with the season starting to take some real shape with some good accumulative totals over that period of time. We are starting to enter the business end of the season and rainfall in the next coming months will determine a make or break season for native farmers. Let’s hope its “make”.
In top form
Local comedian and part time farmer Stewart “Smacka” MacPherson has been in top form with the stick taking out 3 consecutive four ball events at Glenorchy (Ally), Wallaloo (Royal) and Rupanyup (no name yet). He also took out the A Grade scratch at Landsborough in a three way play off under trying circumstances.
The new Ken Heslop
I’m told that Smacka is the new Ken Heslop after he was quoted in the Stawell Times News on the rainfall of the last couple of weeks and the season’s prospect on his property at Norchy. He is probably only “warming to the task” but he has a long way to go to catch up to Heslop who for many years topped the rainfall charts in the Stawell Shire.
Back home
Smacka attended the party at J Ward in Ararat over the weekend. Some would say that if it was still open he may have been a graduate!!!
Hide the Tim Tams
I was told that a local went to Norm “Guru” Duxson’s place for a cup of tea and a chat. Guru Margie made the tea and bought out the Tim Tams, as you do. It was then that The Guru and number one son Herbie asked Guru Margie where she had been hiding them, “in with the carrots, because I knew you wouldn’t be looking there for something to eat” she said. Smart lady is Guru Margie.
Pest can’t pester anyone
Leading Marnoo West grazier Mark “Pest” Raggatt is a little down in the dumps at the moment as he has a very restrictive brace on his injured leg at the moment. They are currently shearing at Raggattville and the pest has rendered himself “useless”.
Enjoying the storyline
Talking to Raggatt the other day in the corner shop and he told me he is enjoying the ongoing story about his great mate “The Guru” and his shrinking jacket. For some reason Tim Tams and shrinking Jackets go hand in hand.
Jack at his best
I was talking to former Marnoo fast bowler John “Jack” Cameron the other day and we got onto one of his favourite subjects, politics, I asked him “where has Peter Garratt been in this climate debate” as to which Jack quickly replied “nowhere because he only comes out at midnight”.
Another on the way
News has just filtered in that leading Rostron cropper Rueben “Rostron” Cheesman and his lovely wife Katrina are expecting their second. I’m guessing he would be one very happy camper at the moment.
The Goodies
Remember The Goodies on the ABC, well don’t be surprised if you see that famous three person bike floating around local circles from August onwards. I’m told a couple of local comedians have purchased one and intend to entertain the masses with their antics.
Good excuse
Cropping guru Andrew “Clown” Newall has organised a trip to WA for some of his no till clients. These types of junkets are well known as “a good excuse for a piss up for the boys” and I have no doubt that this one won’t be any different.
That’s all for now.
Welcome to another week of the SLF. Well it has been a rather moist 10 or so days with the season starting to take some real shape with some good accumulative totals over that period of time. We are starting to enter the business end of the season and rainfall in the next coming months will determine a make or break season for native farmers. Let’s hope its “make”.
In top form
Local comedian and part time farmer Stewart “Smacka” MacPherson has been in top form with the stick taking out 3 consecutive four ball events at Glenorchy (Ally), Wallaloo (Royal) and Rupanyup (no name yet). He also took out the A Grade scratch at Landsborough in a three way play off under trying circumstances.
The new Ken Heslop
I’m told that Smacka is the new Ken Heslop after he was quoted in the Stawell Times News on the rainfall of the last couple of weeks and the season’s prospect on his property at Norchy. He is probably only “warming to the task” but he has a long way to go to catch up to Heslop who for many years topped the rainfall charts in the Stawell Shire.
Back home
Smacka attended the party at J Ward in Ararat over the weekend. Some would say that if it was still open he may have been a graduate!!!
Hide the Tim Tams
I was told that a local went to Norm “Guru” Duxson’s place for a cup of tea and a chat. Guru Margie made the tea and bought out the Tim Tams, as you do. It was then that The Guru and number one son Herbie asked Guru Margie where she had been hiding them, “in with the carrots, because I knew you wouldn’t be looking there for something to eat” she said. Smart lady is Guru Margie.
Pest can’t pester anyone
Leading Marnoo West grazier Mark “Pest” Raggatt is a little down in the dumps at the moment as he has a very restrictive brace on his injured leg at the moment. They are currently shearing at Raggattville and the pest has rendered himself “useless”.
Enjoying the storyline
Talking to Raggatt the other day in the corner shop and he told me he is enjoying the ongoing story about his great mate “The Guru” and his shrinking jacket. For some reason Tim Tams and shrinking Jackets go hand in hand.
Jack at his best
I was talking to former Marnoo fast bowler John “Jack” Cameron the other day and we got onto one of his favourite subjects, politics, I asked him “where has Peter Garratt been in this climate debate” as to which Jack quickly replied “nowhere because he only comes out at midnight”.
Another on the way
News has just filtered in that leading Rostron cropper Rueben “Rostron” Cheesman and his lovely wife Katrina are expecting their second. I’m guessing he would be one very happy camper at the moment.
The Goodies
Remember The Goodies on the ABC, well don’t be surprised if you see that famous three person bike floating around local circles from August onwards. I’m told a couple of local comedians have purchased one and intend to entertain the masses with their antics.
Good excuse
Cropping guru Andrew “Clown” Newall has organised a trip to WA for some of his no till clients. These types of junkets are well known as “a good excuse for a piss up for the boys” and I have no doubt that this one won’t be any different.
That’s all for now.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Welcome again
Another week has just flown by and with last week being a wet one it’s certainly put a smile on the faces of all natives alike.
Big week in Yarra
I headed around to my old mate Dwain “Daryl” Duxson’s place last week and who do I spot Bern “Southern Comfort” Johnson and Belinda “Champagne” Reading, these two along with their rug rats where spending a couple of days with the lovely Paula. They did relay a few stories (no mother in law jokes of course) to me but I made a promise that they wouldn’t go to print. I can tell you though, that I’m miffed as to where they take time for a mouthful of grog, because there was certainly plenty of chatter.
Young upstarts
Young Cooper “Young Phil” Reading and Angus “Ramsay” Johnson provided plenty of entertainment according to Paula, if they weren’t belting each other up they where combining to reek verbal havoc on the young ladies that were in the household.
Out Voss, In Fruity
I’m told that John “Fruity” Nisbet was at the Gold Coast on the weekend, I’m just wondering if he is moving from his beloved Bulldogs and taking on a role at the new Gold Coast Team!!!!
Jack’s back
SLF favourite son John “Jack” Cameron and his lovely wife “Fayzee” where up this way last week, however I didn’t catch up with them due to my busy journalistic schedule (not). I’m sure that a little bowling ball shaped, gold chain wearing taxi driver from Corowa made the effort to catch up with the king of one liners.
Facebook
Once you enter the world of Facebook you certainly become a popular unit, people pop up from everywhere. Now don’t be offended but I am picky as to who I let on as friends but it’s one interesting game. I’m told that it can be quite addictive after local funnyman Stewart “Goalkeeper” MacPherson was spending up to three hours a day on the social networking site. I’m told he has now cut down to about an hour, I bet his mother would be keen for him to reduce a few of his other addictions to the same extent!!!
That’s all for this week
Another week has just flown by and with last week being a wet one it’s certainly put a smile on the faces of all natives alike.
Big week in Yarra
I headed around to my old mate Dwain “Daryl” Duxson’s place last week and who do I spot Bern “Southern Comfort” Johnson and Belinda “Champagne” Reading, these two along with their rug rats where spending a couple of days with the lovely Paula. They did relay a few stories (no mother in law jokes of course) to me but I made a promise that they wouldn’t go to print. I can tell you though, that I’m miffed as to where they take time for a mouthful of grog, because there was certainly plenty of chatter.
Young upstarts
Young Cooper “Young Phil” Reading and Angus “Ramsay” Johnson provided plenty of entertainment according to Paula, if they weren’t belting each other up they where combining to reek verbal havoc on the young ladies that were in the household.
Out Voss, In Fruity
I’m told that John “Fruity” Nisbet was at the Gold Coast on the weekend, I’m just wondering if he is moving from his beloved Bulldogs and taking on a role at the new Gold Coast Team!!!!
Jack’s back
SLF favourite son John “Jack” Cameron and his lovely wife “Fayzee” where up this way last week, however I didn’t catch up with them due to my busy journalistic schedule (not). I’m sure that a little bowling ball shaped, gold chain wearing taxi driver from Corowa made the effort to catch up with the king of one liners.
Once you enter the world of Facebook you certainly become a popular unit, people pop up from everywhere. Now don’t be offended but I am picky as to who I let on as friends but it’s one interesting game. I’m told that it can be quite addictive after local funnyman Stewart “Goalkeeper” MacPherson was spending up to three hours a day on the social networking site. I’m told he has now cut down to about an hour, I bet his mother would be keen for him to reduce a few of his other addictions to the same extent!!!
That’s all for this week
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Welcome to another week
Another week has just flown by and the party at Murray’s bar is all but a distant memory. But time flies and doesn’t stop for anyone so I’d better get on with it.
The Royals the place to be
Without doubt the action last week focussed on the Royal. Tournament week is always a big one and last week was no exception. However the days are gone where they used to tap up 9 gallon barrels and blokes where known to turn up for the ladies events just to test out the lines. Those things don’t happen anymore but it’s still a big week, following is some of the things that happened.
Beat that
The first men’s event is the fourball and this year it attracted an almost full field of 39 pairs. Honours for the day went to local consumers Stewart “Smacka” MacPherson and Ben “Glendemar” Duxson who won the event hands down with 53 points, with Ben highlighting the day with an eagle on hole number 1. I’m sure they celebrated in true Royal spirit.
Celebrated
I’m told that the Royal resembled Wembley Stadium about midnight on Saturday when the soccer ball came out. One such Wal Wal individual John “Red Beard” Kingston was seen celebrating his first goal of the evening with the shirt over the head trick. I think it’s time for security cameras in that joint, you could make a fortune on you tube.
Be My, Be Quiet
Marnoo West Rat Pack member and founding president John “Be My” Guest fell about 10 seconds short of having tomatoes piffed at him after his long winded speech at the Royal on Saturday night. I’m told that he was in fine form and enjoying himself immensely. As you do at Wallaloo.
If he was a racehorse then he would be banned
I’m confused did the drink actually help him or hinder him, I’m talking about “Be My” who registered a 53 and a 38 for each 9. However I’m not sure whether the bad round was in the first 9 or the last. If he was a racehorse he would be banned.
Me and Dad
Wallaloo East living legend Norman “The Guru” Duxson made his way to the stage to accept his trophy for a B Grade best 9 and guess who followed him for the next trophy, yes you guessed it, number one son “Herbie”. It was in that particular order that they left the Royal on Saturday night but the time gap was several hours!!
Points, all important
Tournaments have been known to put the strain on marriages as the blokes head off for the mixed day on the Sunday. Those blokes who have a golfing wife usually team up with them on the Sunday which is always a points winner but for those without a golfing wife it’s like double points (deducted of course) if you play on the Sunday. And then if you are single like Stewart “Smacka” MacPherson (at least that is what he is telling us} you can do what you like and playing 3 days in a row is like water to a ducks back. After winning trophies on day 1 and 2, I will be interested to see if he kept up the form up on the last day.
Rain please
At the time of writing the forecast was for rain a plenty of it. I used to like the old days when the first you heard of rain was when it built up in the West and within a few hours it was raining. Nowadays we get these internet sites that track our rainfall ten day in advance. So the excitement builds and you can’t wait for the big event. Farmers have then been known to fall into deep depression when that almighty forecast doesn’t arrive.
14 cents
I’m told that in 1974 petrol prices were 14 cents per litre, which is a long distant memory.
Tailored to fit
Hot off the press from one of my intrepid spies came the news that “The Guru” has been buying his pants through Don “Fergie” Murphy’s distributor. Now I heard of people going to Melbourne to get fitted out and I’ve even heard of people going to Hong Kong for the same reason, but Don Murphy I’m not sure about that! It also confirms the little story we wrote about Guru a few weeks ago where he was saying his suit jacket had shrunk. The picture is becoming clearer.
That’s all folks
Another week has just flown by and the party at Murray’s bar is all but a distant memory. But time flies and doesn’t stop for anyone so I’d better get on with it.
The Royals the place to be
Without doubt the action last week focussed on the Royal. Tournament week is always a big one and last week was no exception. However the days are gone where they used to tap up 9 gallon barrels and blokes where known to turn up for the ladies events just to test out the lines. Those things don’t happen anymore but it’s still a big week, following is some of the things that happened.
Beat that
The first men’s event is the fourball and this year it attracted an almost full field of 39 pairs. Honours for the day went to local consumers Stewart “Smacka” MacPherson and Ben “Glendemar” Duxson who won the event hands down with 53 points, with Ben highlighting the day with an eagle on hole number 1. I’m sure they celebrated in true Royal spirit.
Celebrated
I’m told that the Royal resembled Wembley Stadium about midnight on Saturday when the soccer ball came out. One such Wal Wal individual John “Red Beard” Kingston was seen celebrating his first goal of the evening with the shirt over the head trick. I think it’s time for security cameras in that joint, you could make a fortune on you tube.
Be My, Be Quiet
Marnoo West Rat Pack member and founding president John “Be My” Guest fell about 10 seconds short of having tomatoes piffed at him after his long winded speech at the Royal on Saturday night. I’m told that he was in fine form and enjoying himself immensely. As you do at Wallaloo.
If he was a racehorse then he would be banned
I’m confused did the drink actually help him or hinder him, I’m talking about “Be My” who registered a 53 and a 38 for each 9. However I’m not sure whether the bad round was in the first 9 or the last. If he was a racehorse he would be banned.
Me and Dad
Wallaloo East living legend Norman “The Guru” Duxson made his way to the stage to accept his trophy for a B Grade best 9 and guess who followed him for the next trophy, yes you guessed it, number one son “Herbie”. It was in that particular order that they left the Royal on Saturday night but the time gap was several hours!!
Points, all important
Tournaments have been known to put the strain on marriages as the blokes head off for the mixed day on the Sunday. Those blokes who have a golfing wife usually team up with them on the Sunday which is always a points winner but for those without a golfing wife it’s like double points (deducted of course) if you play on the Sunday. And then if you are single like Stewart “Smacka” MacPherson (at least that is what he is telling us} you can do what you like and playing 3 days in a row is like water to a ducks back. After winning trophies on day 1 and 2, I will be interested to see if he kept up the form up on the last day.
Rain please
At the time of writing the forecast was for rain a plenty of it. I used to like the old days when the first you heard of rain was when it built up in the West and within a few hours it was raining. Nowadays we get these internet sites that track our rainfall ten day in advance. So the excitement builds and you can’t wait for the big event. Farmers have then been known to fall into deep depression when that almighty forecast doesn’t arrive.
14 cents
I’m told that in 1974 petrol prices were 14 cents per litre, which is a long distant memory.
Tailored to fit
Hot off the press from one of my intrepid spies came the news that “The Guru” has been buying his pants through Don “Fergie” Murphy’s distributor. Now I heard of people going to Melbourne to get fitted out and I’ve even heard of people going to Hong Kong for the same reason, but Don Murphy I’m not sure about that! It also confirms the little story we wrote about Guru a few weeks ago where he was saying his suit jacket had shrunk. The picture is becoming clearer.
That’s all folks
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